Tales From the 'My Family is an Embarassment' Club ABANDONED
by BronzeDove
Summary: Deep in a dark abandoned hall at W Academy, a small club meets every other day. This club was by only know by a select few of the student body as the 'My Family is an Embarrassment' club, and this is their story. [ABANDONED]
1. Prologue-Welcome

You got to keep your ideals high

You got to know that the sky belongs to no one

You know you got to go!

Keep on, little dreamer ~ keep hold of all that you are

…

* * *

Quiet footsteps echoed down a dusty hall as a young man jogged down the hallway, lavender eyes flicking from a small blue flyer and back to the room numbers.

"Damnit, I'm already late where's class 23A?" Matthew Williams, or Canada, swore as he turned another corner, his curl bobbing as he walked. After passing a few more classrooms the boy finally found the number that corresponded with the one on his flyer.

After stuffing the paper into his back pocket and adjusting his glasses, the W Academy student grabbed the handle and opened the door, stepping into the room and quietly closing the door. After taking a few steps into the class the boy finally took the time to check his surroundings.

All the desks had been pushed to the back wall and neatly stacked. In their place was a grey shag rug, a large assortment of coloured beanbags, a coffee machine and mugs sat beside a plugin on the floor and an old flat screen TV was sitting on a table with a plethora of gaming consoles and DVD players attached to it.

Matthew blinked in surprise. "Who sets this all up for a club?" He mumbled.

"I did." A monotonous voice piped up from off to the blondes left.

Matthew whipped around and locked eyes with the person who spoke. The student had ashen hair that was pinned back on one side with a cross pin, navy blue eyes and had a fairy resting on his school uniform.

Canada smiled and gave the other student small wave. "Hello Norway! I'm Canada but you can call me Matthew if you'd like."

Norway nodded and stepped forwards, extending his hand for Matthew to shake. "You can call me Lukas then, it's only fair." The norwegian replied as the canadian shook his hand.

"Are you the one who created this club?" Matthew asked as he took a step back.

Before Lukas could respond, the door slammed open and a figure barreled through the doorway and straight into Canada, sending them both the floor.

The canadians glasses flew off his head and scattered across the floor leaving him completely blind. Matthew groaned and sat up, noticing the blurry figure of Norway and of another on the ground.

Matthew noticed the new figure sit up, unleashing a string of before looking at Matthew.

"Is that you Pancake Bastard?" The person asked in a heavily accented voice.

Canada blinked. Only one person called him Pancake Bastard. "Es-ce que c'est toi Romano?" The french-canadian asked as he rubbed his head.

"Yup it's definitely the Pancake Bastard." He grumbled. "Speak english you dumb fuck, no one here understands french."

Matthew rolled his eyes. "Whatever." He paused. "Can you and Lukas find help find my glasses please?" Canada asked as he felt around for them.

Lukas said yes and Lovino laughed. "You really are blind as a fucking bat aren't you?" He said as Norway handed Canada his glasses.

The canuck flipped the italian the bird and put his glasses on, being sure to thank the Nordic who gave them to him.

"Bats aren't even blind Lovino. It's a common misconception." Matthew said sarcastically, earning a small smile from Lukas.

Lovino laughed. "Yeah? Well you are."

Norway looked at Matthew after that statement. "Why is your vision so bad? I know a lot of other countries have glasses but they can still see without them."

Matthew sighed and stood up. "When I was still a colony America burned my capital to the ground." He said lamely.

Romano blinked and Norway nodded.

"The burger eating fat-ass did that to you? I thought he was your brother!" Romano shouted.

Canada shrugged. "That's a story for another time… We should get on with the club anyways."

Norway nodded. "Welcome to the 'My Family is an Embarrassment' club's first meeting." The viking stated as he motioned for the other two to sit in a beanbag chair.

* * *

 **Well, that's it for the prologue. I know Canada was a bit OOC but he's already friends with Romano in this fic, I will also go further into detail with that later. Please don't forget to RYou Got To Go by Above & Beyond (Seven Lions Remix)**

 **Translations; Es-ce que c'est toi Romano?** _Is that you Romano?_

 **Hetalia belongs to Hidekaz Himaruya, I own nothing.**


	2. 14000 Years

_It's in your eyes, a colour fade out,_

 _Looks like a new transition._

 _The starting up and shaking your ground,_

 _Turning your head to see a new day calling._

 _Does it feel like a head to lean on?_

 _A snapshot from where you were born._

 _I'm looking for your hand in the rough,_

 _You're caught in the wire..._

 _Well I'll lift you out._

* * *

 **...**

" _Welcome to the 'My Family is an Embarrassment' club's first meeting." The viking stated as he motioned for the other two to sit in a beanbag chair._

 **…**

* * *

Norway dropped down into a green beanbag chair and watched as Matthew and Romano did the same. For some strange reason Lukas felt like he knew Matthew. He reminded him of a small country he had met in his viking days, they both had lavender eyes and a strange curl.

Lukas shook thethought from his head and focused on the task at hand; getting to know eveyone in the club.

"I think as a way to get to know each other we could play 20 questions. I could even use a truth spell on all of us." Norway sugested.

After a moment of silence Romano spoke up. "I'm game Viking Bastard."

Canada nodded

After casting the spell, Norway stated that whoever was asked the question had to answer and then ask another person. Canada sugested Romano ask first and Lukas nodded, waiting to see who Lovino would ask.

The brunette turned to the canadian first. "Is it true you beat Russia up during a hockey game?"

Matthew blushed and nodded. "He kept slashing me with his hockey stick so I cross checked him and knocked him down. After that he punched me and it kind of went to hell from there… He won't even play hockey with me unless he absolutely has to…" The canadian added quietly.

Lukas blinked in shock. This scrawny nation beat up Russia?

Lovino laughed and smacked the blonde on the back. "Your turn to ask Matthew."

The canadian nodded and looked at Norway. "Other than Denmark, Finland, Sweden and Iceland, are their any other nordics?"

Norway frowned slightly and gave a nod. "There's Greenland, the Faroe Islands and the Åland Islands. We also had a colony named Vinland but we're not sure which country he is now."

Canada nodded and smiled to himself as if he had an inside joke he was thinking of. Norway frowned and looked to Lovino.

"Is it true you have a crush on Spain?"

Romano blinked, not expecting a question like that from Norway. Lovino blushed a dark shade of red and nodded, not looking at Norway.

The norwegian nodded and waited for the italian to ask the next question, and finally, after calming down Romano looked back at Norway.

"How old is your country Viking Bastard?"

Norway shrugged. "I'm not really sure. We didn't have an accurate counting system in the viking days.

Lovino sighed in defeat, not knowing a way to get back at Lukas. Suddenly Romano's thoughts were interrupted when Norway asked Canada a question.

"How old are you Matthew?"

The canadian looked up at Norway when the question was asked. "Officially, I'm 148, but I've been around about fourteen thousand years."

Lovino promptly fell off his chair.

Lukas had a rare look of shock on his face as he stared at the young blonde. "H-how is that possible?"

Matthew blushed and scratched the back of his head. "I used to be the sole representation of North Amerika."

The room was silent for a moment, Romano still laying on the carpeted floor as he'd chosen to opt out of the conversation at that point, then Lukas spoke.

"Is that you Vinny?" Norway asked quietly.

Canada smirked uncharacteristically. "Took you long enough Bror, roughly six hundred years."

Lukas ran a hand through his bangs and sat back in his chair, watching the canadian with a look of confusion on his face.

Meanwhile, Lovino stood up. "See you two bastards Thursday. I'm going to take a siesta." He stated as he walked out of the room.

"Goodbye!" The canadian called cheerfully before Romano was out of the room causing the italian to turn around and flip the canadian the bird before slamming the door shut, leaving the two other countries alone.

Lukas watched Matthew, thinking of what to say to the canadian. "Why didn't you come tell us? Danmark, Iceland, Finland, Sweden and I looked for you for years, do you know how hard it was on all of us when we couldn't find you again?"

Matthew looked down. "Can you imagine how hard it was on me?" I was just a child! I waited in that village for years!" He stated bitterly, taking a breath to calm himself down. "I did try to tell you by the way… You just never heard me."

Norway looked up at Matthew with a sad expression on his face. "I'm sorry we didn't find you sooner Matthew." He said as he stood, walking over to the canadian and pulling him up. "Why don't we go see the rest of the group and make up for lost time?"

Matthew smiled excitedly. "Really?"

Norway gave a small nod, opening the door and motioning for his brother to follow. "So much for the first club meeting." The blue eyed man scoffed.

Canada chuckled and walked out of the room while Norway turned off the lights.

After walking for a good few minutes of walking, the two countries returned to the main wing of the school only to be greeted by Lovino running down the opposing hallway so fast it was like the devil himself was chasing him.

"Canada! Norway! Save me you bastards!"

He yelled as he jumped into Canada's arms, clinging to the blondes arms while the northern nation held him up effortlessly.

"Save you from what?" Matthew asked while Lukas watched the scene unfold.

Before Romano could explain, the sound of metal scraping across the floor was heard and all three countries looked up to see Russia walking up the them with a menacing purple aura floating behind him.

Romano shrieked and clung to Canada tighter while Norway just stood there with a look of disinterest of his face.

Russia smiled his creepy smile and tilted his head to the side. "South Italy will become one, Da? It's only fair since you hit me." Ivan said as he held his pipe up.

Matthew frowned and pried Romano off of himself and setting him down beside Norway. The blonde sighed and looked back at Russia. "What happened?"

Russia looked confused for a moment before he remembered who was standing in front of him. "Ah, Comrade Matvey, I see you found Comrade Romano. Give him to me, Da?"

Matthew scowled and walked up to the Russian, crossing his arms in disapproval. "I think you should go, eh?"

* * *

 **Ohhh snap! Shits 'bout to go down! Be sure to tune in next time for an arctic showdown!**

 **Song: Witchcraft by Pendulum**

 **Don't forget to R &R!**

 **Autumn-chan out!**

 **Hetalia belongs to Hidekaz Himaruya, I own nothing.**


	3. Comrade Matvey

_Stakes, you stack them so high_

 _I collect flakes_

 _And I watch them fly_

 _Why don't you take it_

 _And use it for good?_

 _Why don't you take what it is you that you have and put it_

 _Where I think you should?_

…

 _Russia looked confused for a moment before he remembered who was standing in front of him. "Ah, Comrade Matvey, I see you found Comrade Romano. Give him to me, Da?"_

 _Matthew scowled and walked up to the Russian, crossing his arms in disapproval. "I think you should go, eh?"_

…

Russia smiled that creepy smile and looked down at Canada. "I see Comrade Matvey has made some friends, Da?"

The canuck nodded and looked back at his friends. Lovino was scowling from where he stood slightly behind Lukas. The Norwegian, on the other hand, stood there impassively, watching the scene unfold.

Suddenly, Matthew felt a hand pat his head. Turning, the nation noticed that Russia was now smiling at him in a friendly manner. "That is good. Matvey shouldn't be lonely."

The Russian then turned to the nations standing behind Canada. "Treat Comrade Matvey well or I will break all your bones!" Ivan said as he turned and walked away.

After a moment of shock, Romano walked up to Matthew and pulled the tall blonde into a headlock. "Matteo, Matteo, Matteo…. I am going to be uncharacteristically patient and give you a chance to explain what the _fuck_ just happened. You have thirty seconds before I sic the mafia on you to get answers." The italian released his northern friend. "Go."

Matthew's eyes widened. "I-used-to-date-Ukraine-so-Ivan-and-I-are-good-friends-when-he-remembers-who-I-am! We-also-play-hockey-sometimes!" He explained quickly.

Lovino turned to Lukas. "Did you understand any of that?"

The Nordic shook his head slightly. "No. Lillebror needs to speak slower." He deadpanned.

Romano looked back to Matthew. "You heard the viking bastard. Speak so we can actually understand what the hell you're saying."

Canada flushed and wrung his hands nervously. "Well, a while back I dated Ukraine so I ended up talking to Russia a lot two. We're actually good friends and when he remembers me we get along well. We play hockey often… I thought I told you that already."

Lovino threw his hands up in the air. "I give up! This kid is so fucking messed up I just can't even! I wouldn't be surprised if this bastard keeps world domination plans in his sock drawer!"

With a final huff, the southern Italian marched down the plain-looking hallways and off to his dorm, leaving Matthew and Lukas alone.

"Merde!" Matthew cursed. "Now I have to hide it again…" He muttered as he kicked at the carpet with his red converse.

Norway rolled his eyes and grabbed Canada's sleeve, dragging his off to find the other Nordics. "Really brother… Your sock drawer?"

"What!? It was practical!"

* * *

…

 **(Cue Spongebob voice) Two days later…**

Seeing as Thursday had rolled around, our three adorkable little cinnamon buns were currently sitting in Norway's hole-in-the-wall club room completely silent, staring at each other and waiting for someone to talk.

Finally, Lovino stood up, pulling on his jacket and grabbing his bag, slinging it over his shoulder. "I'm going out for coffee. Anyone coming?"

Norway instantly perked up at the mention of the caffeinated drink and stood as well, straightening out his shirt and looking at his brother, who was currently rubbing his temples.

Matthew groaned and stood. "Yea, sure."

Lovino made a face and looked at Lukas. "The fuck is wrong with him?" He asked as he watched Matthew glare at the floor.

"The idiot Dane took him out drinking last night."

Lovino snorted and shook his head, walking out the door and into the hallway, Canada and Norway close behind him, the Norwegian closing the door with a soft click.

"You better not be taking us to one of Alfred's godforsaken franchises… If it is I swear I will acquaint you with my hockey stick."

Lovino chuckled as he walked. "Matteo… Never in my life will I drink the liquid shit you North Americans call coffee."

Matthew looked up at Lovino and glared. "For insulting the heaven-sent called Tim Hortons, you will be paying for my drink."

The Italian man rolled his eyes and continued walking. 26 steps and they were outside of the school. 59 steps and they were walking past the front gates. 384 long-ass steps and they were on the street at the end of the drive way. 933 more steps and they had reached the dainty coffee shop that Lovino had visited once or twice before. Yes, Lovino was counting. An antisocial Norwegian and a hungover Canadian weren't the best for making conversation and Lovino really didn't care enough to try to talk to them.

Lovino pulled open the door and was greeted by the delicious smell of fresh ground coffee and warm pastries. The Italian took a deep breath and walked in, surveying the shop as he stood in line. The walls were covered by bookshelves and were filled to the max with board games, art supplies, CD's and books.

Upon turning around, Lovino noticed that his club-mates seemed to be enjoying themselves. Matthew had instantly brightened when he saw the french books and Lukas was staring at the instruments, mostly the violin, that sat in the corner.

Lovino smiled as he stepped up to the counter to order. He was happy that his new friends were interested in something he liked.

* * *

 **Now, a sneak peek of chapter 4…**

" _Really Netherlands... Rihanna?"_

 _..._

" _Matt, what the fuck did you put in that brownie?!"_

 _..._

" _Stop quoting Vines you dumbasses!"_

 _..._

" _We should go camping."_

...

" _Lovino, no."_

" _Lovino, yes."_

 _..._

" _Norway… What is that?"_

" _Lifrarkæfa._

"…"

" _Liver_ _pâté._ "

" _Oh my god."_

* * *

 **Song; Use It For Good by Fallulha**

 **Yeaaaaa…. I'm not sorry for not updating… I've been really busy lately… Anyways, I hope you enjoyed chapter three! Don't forget to review!**


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